Random Pokemon Crap of Boredom
by Cutie8767
Summary: So I was bored one day. Here is random crap. Enjoy it. Now. If you follow it, Iris will give you a Dragonite. Maybe. Just maybe. Okay so read my randomness and bye!
1. Natural Harmonia v Gary Oak

N is walking in the Kanto region with Anthea and Concordia.

"Hey, dude, I have more swag than you!" Gary yells.

Anthea and Concordia turn around to see a 13 year old boy with a group of young women.

"Really? You look nothing cool." Concordia stated.

"Oooh! Buuuurrrnn!" two girls from Gary's team yells.

"Shut up." he snaps.

"Right! Go Gary, you got more swag than this old asparagus head!" they cheered.

"I really do not care. Swag is a stupid word, anyway, you weirdo." N returned.

"Oooh! Buuuurrrnn!"

"Shut UP!" he snaps.

"Well, at least my girls here aren't sissies." Gary returned.

"Oooh! Buuurnnn!" the girls jeered.

"Hahaha!" Gary Oak cackled. "Two hags..."

"What?!" Anthea snapped. "We're so NOT hags!"

"Hahahahahaha!" Gary laughed. "You girls crack me up."

"I'm leaving." said N.

"Chicken!" Gary cackled.

"What did you say?" N demanded furiously.

"Bawk Bawk!"

"Go, Reshiram, Fusion Flare!" he shouted.

Gary ran away with all of his girls.

"Chicken!" N, Anthea and Concordia shouted in harmony.

The Harmonia's were never messed with again. Except maybe by Ghetsis a few times more.

Never mess with the N or you will get an embarrassing beatdown.


	2. Geese lay eggs Lol

Once upon a time, Ash, Misty, and Brock are eating sunny-side up eggs.

Misty noms on the delicious eggs and looks at Ash.

"So, Ash, I heard people were talking about you..." said Misty. "You know, why you happen to be ten years old?"

Ash stares in awe at Misty. "It's because, I need to be ten so when I go to Unova, Iris can call me a little kid. Duh."

"But, you are in Kalos, right?" she adds.

"Gah! You're right!" said Ash. He looks around and notices Serena, Clemont, and Bonnie staring at him.

"You were talking to yourself..." said Serena.

"I wanna go back to Kanto!" he yelled.

"Oookkkaaayyy..." said Serena.

"Bye, Ash! We won't miss you!" said Bonnie.

"Bonnie!" Clemont snapped, giving her a rude nudge on the shoulder.

"Sorry, Ash." she added.

So Ash went to Kanto and Serena ate his face. No she didn't. What are tou talking about. I told you, you're dyslexic.

Anyway, cows...

So then Serena gets on the plane.

"Hey, Ash. I'm here!" she squeals.

"Aaah!" Ash screams.

"What?" she asks.

"Nothing, you just scared me." said Ash.

"Okay, Ash." she said. "Dude, I thought you hated me for a second there..."

"Yay. Crap." he said.

A lady comes by. "Would you like to eat anything?" she asks.

"I'll take some eggs." he says.

The lady gives him the stink eye. "I'm half goose chicken! And goose chickens lay eggs!"

Ash sighs and feels guilty. The end.


	3. Mei's day made no sense

Once upon a time. Mei is jogging.

She is stopped by a Team Plasma grunt. "Now your Pokemon have been turned into _our_ weapons!" she shouted.

"What?!" says Mei, checking her bag to find a bunch of swords and a Pokemon hypnosis machine in the place of her Pokemon.

"I'll be taking those now." she said. "IMA FIRIN MA LAZER BWAAAHHH!"

"Noooooooooo!" Mei cried as it faded into darkness playing Lavender town music...

She woke up in N's castle.

N looked at her and sang "WHAT DOES THE FOOX SAAYY?"

"Ringeringdingeingindigneinginwigndingsing" Anthea and Concordia sang.

"Could my day get anyworse?" Mei moaned.

Ghetsis came in and was all like: "DR OCTAGONAPUS BWAAAH"

And on that day, Mei's day was filled with pointless memes.


	4. Concordia faints a team rocket moustache

Once upon a time, Misty, Ash, Serena, Brock and N are walking around in a circle.

Then James shows up because he is Team Rocket and so does Jessie. Meowth is there too. They are eating muffins and then Misty shrieks.

"AHHH IT'S TEAM ROCKET!" she shrieks in a manly voice because she is bipolar.

"What?" asks Ash.

"Nothing" she says in her normal voice.

Then N says something really retarded.

"Hey, I found a Magikarp. I was thinking, how about we release Ash's Pikachu and take this Magikarp instead? He could use a friend, and Pikachu has been trapped with Ash for 17 years. And plus trainers are evil." he suggests, glaring at Ash's Pikachu who is about to electrocute him.

"CHUUUUU" Pikachu yells while shocking N. Then Anthea and Concordia come out of a thick fog.

"I'm a dude!" says Concordia. She is being hypnotized by a Drowzee.

"Concordia Helena Harmonia Gropious, you are a female." Anthea reassures her as she notices her sister fall to the ground. Ash and his friends attention gears to the unconscious girl, especially N, because his sister just said she was a dude and fell to the ground.

And then James steals Pikachu and says "IM THE REAL DUDE, YA WEIRD LITTLE COW DERP!"

Jessie nudges him on the shoulder because he just made it obvious that Ash's Pikachu is not there anymore.

Jessie grows a moustache. And Misty starts singing.

Pikachu runs away and so does the rest except Concordia so she is taken off by a mermaid. And since Team Rocket failed they blast off again even though nothing even blasted them off in the first place.

"TSUKI TSUKI!" says Anthea as a weird statement. And now they are running on rainbows.

This story does not make any sense.

Deal with it.


	5. Ash's true love

Ash Serena N Brock and Misty are traveling through Kanto with their new friend Anthea at their side.

"Hahaha" says Anthea.

"Why did you laugh?" asks Serena.

"Because I can." said Anthea, in disbelief of how rude people could be.

"Oh." says Serena. Then a huge rock fall from the sky and hit Brock in the face.

He falls to the ground. "Ahh Nurse Joy I love you bla bla bla women are pretty" he mutters then he is unconscious.

"Brock!" Anthea gasps then she runs over to help Brock up.

Serena runs away because she is scared another rock will appear.

Then Anthea is sad and starts to cry on Brock's shoulder.

"I hope one day we can be in love." says Ash.

"Yes, I want to go on a date with you too." Misty replies.

"I said I hope. I can't fall in love with you because I hate you for starters."

"You're gonna need a burn heal for that!" says Gary.

"What the? Gary! Why are you here?" Ash snaps.

"Because, this is Random Pokemon Crap of Boredom. Duh." he replies. "It's not intended to make sense."

"Oh yeah, right." says Gary. I mean Ash. I mean Misty. I mean Batman.

Then one of Gary's girls asks Ash "Can I go on a date with you? You're single, right?" and then Ash says "Sorry, I'm already taken!" he says, winking at Misty.

Then when Gary and his harem of girls that are way older than him leave, Misty looks at Ash, blushing.

"Ash, you winked at me! So, we're dating?"

"No" Ash says to Misty's surprise. Her jaws drop.

"Then why'd you wink at me?" she demands furiously.

"Because I was trying to make Gary jealous. My true love..."

"Oh, I get it." Misty snaps. "You leave me, to see those other girls. The beautiful girl May, the sweet and pretty girl Dawn, the fabulous and wild Iris, your old friend Serena, and even Anthea here!"

"Hey! I like Brock!" says Anthea, in defense of Ash.

"No, not any of those girls.. It's..."

Misty stares at Ash angrily.

"Bacon." Ash answers.

"WHAAATTT?! Oh, you're cheating on me with a piece of bacon? I should've known, Ash, you've got alot to learn." she moans, falling to the ground.


	6. Advice from Cilan

Alright, so something really stupid happens again. Misty, Ash, Anthea, Serena, N, and Brock are now jogging around fairies making armpit farts while getting chased by devilish unicorns.

Suddenly, they all wake up.

"I had a dream, that fairies were armpit farting, we we're jogging around them, gettin chased by devil unicorns!" they all said in harmony and are confused now.

"We all had that dream?" Anthea asks.

"Seems so." replies Misty.

"I like trains!" says Cilan, behind Misty.

"GAAAHHH!" Misty shrieks. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING BEHIND ME RANDOM DUDE?"

Cilan chuckles. "Evaluating you." he says. Then Misty slaps him in the face. "Really, dude?!" she snaps.

"AHHH! Wait, no! I mean, evaluating your trainer skills! I was checking your Pokedex and how many gym badges you had!"

"... Oh." she says. "I'm Cerulean's gym leader, BTW."

"You realize BTW and by the way have the same amount of syllables, right?" says N.

"YAY!" shouts Anthea.

"What is it?" asks Serena.

"Am I not allowed to say yay?" demands Anthea.

"Uhhh... No." Serena responds.

"I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING!" shouts Anthea, covering her eyes as tears come out.

"Aw, man. Here comes the waterworks." sighs N.

"Come on, no need to cry. I'll give you an evaluation of your Gothitelle!" Cilan suggests. "Want me to?"

"Ye-" Anthea replies, but Ash interrupts her. "ANTHEA DON'T YOU DARE SAY YES OR ELSE I WILL DESTROY YOUR GOSHDARNED FACE!"

Anthea's mood drops again and here come the waterworks.

"Come on, sis. Cilan is the worst and most irritating Connoisseur that has ever lived. And I haven't even heard him evaluate yet, but Iris's Axew told me it sucks to listen to it." N adds, trying to cheer up his soulsister.

"YOU ARE A TERRIBLE BROTHER I WANTED TO LISTEN TO CILANS EVALUATION BUT NOOO YOU ARE A TERRIBLE BROTHER N I HATE YOU!" she shouts at N.

"Come, on, Anthea." N says.

"I'll evaluate!"

Even Misty looks regretful. N sighs and Ash feels the irritation already.

"Gothitelle is a psychic type. Long ago, Psychic types-"

His Connoisseury evaluation is sooo boring even Terra didn't have the energyt to write it down. Terra is the author's name. Deal with it.

Everyone is asleep. Cilan steals their shoes. Everyone wakes up without shoes and is mad at Cilan for boring them to sleep and stealing their shoes. The end.


	7. Espurr San

Ash, Misty, Serena, Anthea, N, and Brock have no shoes so they go to Mars to buy a new copy of Pokemon X. But when they get back so are their shoes. So they wear them. And then Santa Claus appears.

"Ho Ho Ho, get a life!" he says.

"What? Santa?" Misty gasps.

"Nothing!" Santa says, flying away on magical unicor-reindeers, and then he drops an Espurr on Misty's face because YOLO.

This may be the shortest chapter in the whole story.


	8. Espurr is evil

Misty is confused as she looks at the Espurr.

"Santa! What the Magikarpian Cow do you want me to do with this!" she shrieks. "This is the creepiest Pokemon EVER!"

But Santa is already on Pluto and doesn't care.

"Aw, Ash can you take this piece of crap for me?"

Ash is hallucinating Misty is a sandwich.

"Nom nom nom nom nom" he says.

"Hello? Ash?"

"Nom!" he says, then he noms Misty's arm.

"What the?!" she says, and slaps him onto the ground. "I'm not a sandwich!"

"Yes you are, mister sandwich man"

"I am a woman, Ash!"

Ash snaps out of it because Anthea is laughing for no good reason while tacos and taxis eat unicorn devils.

"Hahahahahaha" says Anthea. "I like trains"

"Wait, no, Anthea!"

Anthea is now the I like trains kid.

"Unicorns!" she says and her eyes turn rabies. I mean rubies. I mean ribies.

Then N thinks he is Batman.

"Alright, that's enough! I'm going back to Kalos!" Serena shrieks.

"Me too!" says Brock. "And I didn't even get to ask Anthea out! Now she's the I like trains kid!"

"No!" Serena shrieks.

They leave for Kalos, N is Batman, Anthea is the I like trains kid, Ash hallucinates food, and I don't know why Misty's not doing anything.

"I'm leaving!" she says.

She drops the Espurr and she wakes up on the ground.

Surrounded by rainbows.

So is the rest of the gang.

YOLO.


	9. Dreams

Alright, forget the storyline. Brock is a magical unicorn in the kingdom of unicorns.

"Neigh!" he neighed.

"Neigh Neigh Neigh Neigh Neigh?" said Unicorn Nurse Joy.

Brock the magical unicorn fell in love with Unicorn Nurse Joy, and then Croagunk the Fairymon carried him away with pixie dust.

"Neigh! Neigh Neigh Neigh Neigh Neigh Neigh Neigh Neigh Neigh!" he shrieked in agony.

"Neigh Neigh!" said Unicorn Nurse Joy.

"Neigh!" said Brock from a faraway distance and then he farted out rainbows.

"AHHHH!" Brock screamed as he woke up. "What was up with that dream?"

Then he walks over to Espurr. "You did this, didn't you?"

Espurr laughs and WHY THE HECK IS ESPURR TAKING OVER THE PLOT?

Oh wait, this story doesn't have a plot. It's Random Pokemon Crap of Boredom. It's not intended to make sense. Nor have a plot. Oh well.

So, Misty wakes up, because Anthea is a really loud sleeptalker. She's been talking about Touko and N's date.

"Then Touko... Zzzz... Asks N... Zzz... Close your eyes... And as he does their lips meet... But suddenly I appear and say I LIKE TRAINS then they... Zzzz... DIIIIEEEEE!"

As soon as Anthea screams die, Serena wakes up. And N's all like "Anthea, what the Magikarpian cow unicorn?"

"I had a dream I was a unicorn." says Brock, just at an excellent time for Anthea's awakening.

Anthea stares at Brock for a long time... Very long time... Like, wow.

"AHHHHHH HAAAA AHHH HAAAAA YOU DREAM ABOUT UNICORNS HAHAHHAHAHAHA YOUR SUCH A WEIRDO HAAAAAHHHHAAAAHHHHAAAH!"

"And there go my chances of asking out Anthea." Brock sighs.

"Ha, Harmonia is such a beautiful name I would change to obtain your last name, but now, I wouldn't waste it on such a weirdo! LOL!"

N's eye twitched. "Did... You. Just. Say. LOL?!"

Then everything explodes the end.


	10. Anthea tells her love story

"It was the exchange of looks. Our eyes met and I fell in love with James from the start. He started to blush when I looked at him, and when he looked at me my heart pounded. Yes, we were both in love with eachother, I could tell. But, I didn't have the willpower to say the three words I wanted to say..."

"Wow." said Serena. "For once, you're not talking about unicorns."

"Or Zombie Barbie Dolls taking over the world on Friday the 13th!" said Ash.

"Please, go on. It's such a touching love story!" Misty squealed.

"He looked as if he were about to burst. Maybe if I told him how I felt he'd feel better... But I didn't want to say them! I didn't want to put James through all the trouble! After all, I loved him, and I didn't want it all to be over..."

"So, did you tell him?" asked Misty.

"I took a huge breath, and I said the words..."

"Really?"

"OMG MISTEH STAHP!" Anthea shouted.

"Right."

"I said the words..."

"AWWW THATS SO ROMANTIC!" Misty squeaked, literally.

"MISTEH AW MAH GAWSH STAHP INTEHRUPTENG MEH!"

"Fine."

"I said..."

Misty was internally screaming, waiting for the best part.

"I..."

"EEEKKKKK!" Misty squealed internally.

"I like trains."

"Wait, you're kidding, right?"

Then a train came because she said I Like Trains and everything exploded again.

RAINBOW BACON!

Became the newest 1D member.

So like One Direction would just sing there and a piece of rainbow bacon would flop around and fangirls would go cra-cray over the bacon.

May ate the bacon and everyone started crying.

Now every Pokemon character known to mankind is running on rainbows.

What a perfect ending to this chapter.


	11. Misty's Moustache Adventures

Once upon a time Misty decided she should grow a moustache. Yes, a moustache. Misty wants to grow a flipping **moustache**.

"Ash? What the Magikarpian Arceus is Misty doing?" Brock asked.

"Trying to grow a moustache, apparently..."

"Why?" asked Brock.

"HAHUIOEOBWFYIDEABCHIDEOBACEDHICONDEAIUCBEDAIHOCBIH" said Anthea.

"Okay, you know, sis, you're really creeping me out." N replied.

"HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHMWAHHAHAHAMWAHAHAHAHAHHAA" she laughed.

"Really, Anthea, sometimes I seriously worry about you..."

"MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA"

"Now I remember why, back when we were kids, Ghetsis almost lost it and trapped you in an asylum..."

"DIFQEOUYFDAKJCNKMMAWHANAMQSDIEJDUSJXmajshdhdkofuwnmdudgxjeksols"

"ANTHEA! SHUT UP!"

"-_-" said Anthea because you can totally speak emoticon nowadays.

So then Misty came out with a moustache doing the duckface.

"What the actual Magikarp?" Serena gasped.

"OMG MISTEH U LOOK BAYOOTEHFUEL!" Anthea squealed.

"You know, sometimes I really worry about you..." said N.

"I LIIIIKKKEEEE TRAAIII-"

"ANTHEA VERBENA HARMONIA GROPIOUS, YOU WILL **NOT **SAY THAT YOU LIKE TRAINS!"

"Hehehe, like this? I like trains."

Then the world exploded due to Anthea's stupidity. And Misty survived because she had a moustache. Then, she flew off into space and ate Nyan cat then discovered Pluto and flew around in circles. After that, she went to other animes and destroyed everything with her awesome moustache.

In the land of DanganRonpa, she ate donuts with Asahina, but her moustache rubbed against the creme of the donut. Also, she tried to kill Monobear, but apparently "Violence against the principal will not be tolerated". But her moustache prevented her from getting hurt. Even though she's not even a Hope's Peak Academy student. So, due to Monobear's logic, she destroyed the planet with her moustache.

In the land of Dragonball Z she fought off Goku with her moustache. She accidentaly destroyed the planet, along with the universe, with all the dragonballs.

She went to more and more anime, but nothing were the same, and her moustache kept exploding planets.

So, she shaved her moustache.

"No! Misty!"

"Yes, I'm tired of you, annoying moustache! Go Seaking!"

"Go Arceus!" the moustache called out because YOOOLLLOOOOOO!

Seaking fainted Arceus. Your argument is invalid.

The time warped back, and she found herself in Colress's labarotory again.

"MISTY! Y RU GETTENG EH MUSTASHIO!"

"I decided... I won't." she sighs, remembering the destruction, and thinking of why Colress even has a moustache applier in his lab anyway.


	12. Better Love Story than Twilight

One day Lance, the pokemon leader in kanto, was fighting everyone. He lost. The end.

But nobody cares about him, right? Because Misty, Anthea, Serena, May, Dawn, Bianca, and Lyra are talking. I just put Anthea in this group because, eh, she can teleport.

Then they all start talking about random Unovian frogs.

"One day, a Growlithe was eating this we-" May explained, but was quickly interrupted.

"NOBODY FLIPPING GIVES A CRAP!" Anthea yelled.

"Dang." May muttered, backing her seat up, but then she realized she was sitting on a chair. The chair was glued to the floor, the floor to the building, the building to the ground, the ground to the rocks, the rocks to Earth, the Earth to the universe. May realized this was serious buisness. If she were to move the chair back, the world would explode. She decided not to, though, because Anthea's eyebrows look weird.

"Haha, your eyebrows are weird" May said.

Anthea caught on fire and her face turned into a volcano. I'm gonna give you a moment to let that sink in.

* * *

Sinked in yet? Okay, good.

May backed up her chair, but it wouldn't back up because it was glued to the floor.

Most likely, the place caught on fire because Anthea was on fire, and since her face was a volcano now, it was awkward for her to walk.

"I CANT SEE ANYTHING!" but nobody heard her because her face is a volcano. Volcanoes do not have mouthes. I think they are sad alot. No wonder they explode so much.

Anyway, since Anthea is not only the I like trains kid, but now a volcano, Concordia came back with the mermaid, who was suspiciously wearing a bra. I don't think people sell undergarments underwater, yet again they both start with under, so what the heck do I know? WHO CARES?

Then Ash falls from the sky, and Misty is all like "OMG, like, what are you doing here, like, Ash?"

And then Bianca is like "OUTTA MAH WAY, OUTTA MAH WAY, OUTTA MAH WAAAAYYYYYY!" even though she's sitting down.

Then Brock falls down too and he's all like "OMG A MERMAID!" and right when he's about to ask her out, he turns around and realizes Anthea is a volcano.

"What the-?"

Then Volcanthea falls on her face because she is part volcano.

Then Concordia turns into an iceberg.

Then the universe explodes.

So they run on rainbows again, and then Dawn decides they have a tournament in Injustice. Dawn plays as catwoman, and Bianca plays as Harley Quinn. Then Anthea plays as a volcano. Then Dawn and Bianca are all like "How the heck... What the heck?"

For the rest of the game, Anthea doesn't know what she's doing because her face is a volcano.

Then she falls on her face. Her volcano face.

"OMG ENTHEHEH! WEHLL YEH STURHP BEHEING EH VOLCANEH!" Iris yells.

"Oh yeah, right." she says.

"Yay Anthea is not a volcano." says N. "Whoop dee doo."

Then Brock gets stabbed in the butt by Croagunk.

"AHHHHHH OH HOLEY ARCEUS WHAT THE HECK DID I DO?!"

Croagunk becomes a volcano and that children is how the universe was created.


End file.
